Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Is God Big Enough

I found the journal writing below in some old Word documents the other day - just randomly.  I wrote it in December 2009 (almost 2 1/2 years ago) and never did anything with it.  Little did I know back in December 2009 that the audience who would need it would be... ME!  But God knew.  I am posting it now and also need to clarify something written in my profile section to the left under my picture... it says "Meniere's is a disease without a cure..." and that's really WAY too short-sighted of me.  Let me rephrase - "Meniere's is a disease for which MAN has not found a cure."  God can cure my Meniere's with a blink, word, thought, breath, thumbs-up, whatever he chooses... I know that.   And the information below just supports it.

Is God Big Enough? (Written by me in December 2009)

I was in a church meeting recently where we were discussing a sensitive and emotional matter.  We were talking about potential outcomes and the possible impact to the church.  One member of our group stated that, “God is bigger than all of this” and it resonated with me.

My daughter suffers from asthma.  In the past year she’s been hospitalized four times for “meltdowns” that we could not control at home.  In addition to these four episodes there have been countless others that have deprived me of sleep, added numerous grey hairs and shaved a good 10 years off my life.  My nerves and fears always seem to get the best of me during those times. 

Is my God big enough in the middle of the night?  Of course!

My friend’s little boy is about to go through an assessment to determine the severity of some behavioral problems he is having.  His actions towards others seem to indicate that he may have a condition that affects his ability to feel remorse for things he does to others. This family is agonized over this possibility and the fate of their child’s future

Is my God big enough to care for this family?  Of course!

I have a friend going through serious martial and financial problems.  She and her husband are separated and shuffling their kids back and forth between them.  They have sought legal advice on how to handle the repossession of their cars, the foreclosure of their house and their impending bankruptcy.

Is my God big enough to bring them back from the brink?  Of course!

Not only is God big enough to fix any of our problems, more importantly He’s big enough to fix our broken hearts and worries as we go through this life.  His manner of “fixing” something may not be what we had in mind, but that’s the beauty of it all.  He’s always got bigger plans and goals and HE KNOWS the FINAL OUTCOME.

So why don’t I trust and why do I worry?  Because my finite brain often forgets that He is Always Bigger than anything I’m facing.  Faith isn’t logical; I can’t explain it, touch it or put parameters on it.  In order to have faith and believe HE CAN, I have to let go of ME and my assumptions of how I think things should or will end.

That doesn’t mean I won’t suffer tragedies, let-downs, set-backs and disappointments; it just means I have a God who loves me and always keeps me in the palm of His hand.
Isaiah 55:8-9 (New International Version)
 8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
       neither are your ways my ways,"
       declares the LORD.

 9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
       so are my ways higher than your ways
       and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Now back to April 2012...

Thank you God for this reminder of who you are and how big you are and thank you that you have healed Lydia of ALL asthma meltdowns - she has not been hospitalized since I wrote the above.  The last few days haven't been so great for me and these subtle ways God puts in my path to keep things in perspective are much appreciated! 

I had my first assessment for rehab Monday and it was awesome - I REALLY like the therapist, Summer. She seems to have a good handle on treating dizziness disorders through rehab.  I started a few little exercises this week and I don't know if that's what's got me not feeling great or what.

I also started reading a new book by Bob Sorge - The Fire of Delayed Answers.  I can't WAIT to get into it.  In his intro he says, "In His infinite grace, God personalizes some troubles with our name on them, in order to help us toward His design for our lives."  In Chapter 1, he goes on to say "We need not fear or dread the calamity; if it comes, it is customized in advance by our loving heavenly Father just for us."  These go back to my recent post about being CHOSEN.

THANK YOU all again for your prayers and support.  Please pray 1) for complete, miraculous remission from ALL symptoms, 2) my attitude in the interim as I allow God to use me and 3) as I continue on with rehab until remission that the dizziness won't be too bad and that I can function enough to care for my family.

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